If your relationship feels more anxious than pleasant, you may need to face the reality that you are in a one-sided relationship. If these signs are sounding all too familiar, it might be time to stop trying to make things work and start looking for someone who will love you back.
Text? Call? Facebook? Tweet? Tag?
Seriously questioning if you should send him a text message or call him is a good sign you are trying too hard to make things work out. Being in a relationship means you should feel comfortable calling him on the phone and not being wracked with worry that you are being annoying or inconvenient. Little messages from your partner should be the highlight of your day, not something you dread.
Walking on eggshells
If you are intentionally avoiding certain topics of conversation because you know you’ll hit a nerve, that’s a big red flag. Obviously, you shouldn’t intentionally push his buttons to try to start an argument, but you should be able to speak your mind and be treated respectfully. A healthy relationship can’t function if you feel like you can’t ever bring up a handful of topics. Don’t live your life trying to keep your boyfriend in a perpetually good mood.
Penciling things in
The fact that you are the one who makesall the plans should stop you in your tracks. A balanced relationship will have both give and take. He should want to plan something special for you in return, instead of just showing up to whatever you’ve put together. Yes, life and work get in the way, but if you are always the only one coordinating when you’ll see each other next, it’s time to call it quits.
Putting on a face
Hiding who you are in a relationship is an impossible task to keep up. If you can’t be yourself with the person you are dating, there is no use being in that relationship. Being someone you are not should show that you are trying too hard to make things work out.
Pleading your case
Meeting friends and family is a part of being in a relationship, so needing to convince him to introduce you to coworkers, roommates, family or friends is a warning sign. People move at different speeds in a relationship, but if you haven’t met one acquaintance and you are ready for him to meet your family, that’s something to be worried about. You obviously care more than he does.
It’s always past or present
Do you ever talk about the future together? If so, are you the only who brings it up? If you seem to be the only one ever mentioning “where things are going,” it’s a good sign he may not be thinking about you in his future.
You may have noticed a couple of these signs already in your relationship, but have gotten good at making excuses. If that’s true for you, it’s time to stop. Be honest with yourself. You deserve to be in a relationship where you don’t have to make excuses for someone who isn’t as involved as you are.
Don’t spend your time trying to force a relationship; love has its ups and downs, but it doesn’t mean it is solely your job to keep things going.